I highly recommend this article, if only for the snazzy graph, and the moustache. Reading that, I had the same feeling of envy and wonder I had a couple years ago when that Peter Pan guy’s site was so popular.
This is what the article says about how to improve your blog: 1. provide something unique; 2. provide something valuable; 3. be first; 4. do your research; and 5. learn to write very well.
Not just well, but very well. If you just write well, you’re f*cked, in a nutshell.
What great and unique ideas, you say. Why didn’t someone else think of that already, you ask. Why is your blog so popular, Mig, since you don’t do any of that stuff, you also ask.
Because, I say, that guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about, while I do, obviously. Here is the secret formula:
Mig’s top-secret formula i.e. How to Really have a Popular Blog:
- Use ordered lists alot, or unordered lists for that matter, to appear organized.
- Write wistfully about deer now and then.
- Or tortoises.
- Post like a m*therf*cker, several times a day.
- Send Eeksypeeksy free shit so he comments on your blog, this attracts intellectuals.
- Give away buttons.
- Have
limerickpoetry contests. And neologism contests. - Start a bunch of projects that peter out, or take off once you give them to someone else.
- Get a pig shave.
- I’m forgetting something. Not sure what.
I tried the pig shave thing. Didn’t work.
I found that posting like a M*th*er*uc*er works best. What happens is that Google bot crawls you like a M*th*er*uc*er and then you can just count those as “hits.” I mean, hits are hits, right?
Shh, I’m trying to trick people into getting pig shaves.
What is a pig shave? all I can find is this gallery of hair styles.
http://www.pigshave.com/gal/ps_gal.html
Intellectuals, eh? Any intellectuals reading my stuff are probably just killing time between dental appointments and pig shaves. Speaking of which, I’m getting the razor out tonight.
Speaking of- could you change the settings at LIT- I’m there- all alone- not really having much to say.
And being there alone makes that much more obvious.
fixed the settings, sue. i’d been meaning to do that.
That’s a nice gallery, Anita. A pig shave is a very short haircut. Be careful with that razor, Eeksy. Wait, what are you shaving? Good luck and get well soon etc.
http://www.ofrenda.org/rawr/calacas/0403291133_.php
“Write wistfully about deer now and then. ”
how to have a popular blog
i have printed out all of the lists on what to do…and not to do…stuck them in pretty compendiums and given them to students, but the truth is, these ‘blogging truths’ are self evident. original content, research, something to say,…
I dunno..I might try a pig shave, but I’m not giving up my moustache, that’s for sure.
I was beginning to think that the recipe for a Popular Blog was only a myth. Illusive. The Holy Grail of our own time.
The problem with my own search, I realize now, is that I’d begun looking from the bottom up. “I’m forgetting something” was easy enough to find, but with my thinning hair, “get a pig shave” would have eluded me for years.
I have a beard, does that count?
okay, i’ve been thinking about that other guy’s list since you put this up, and i just can’t stop being disturbed.
it reminds me of stuff i read in high school about “how to attract boys!” or something like that. it’s just… wasn’t the point of the internet “communities” in general and blogging in particular supposed to be that finally you didn’t have to dale carnegie your way into a room of restricted options, but you could be yourself, web-swinging across the virtual world, and in doing so find like-minded souls?
well…so his thing was troubling, as were the recent “a list” themed postings at wonderchicken.
but you, deer mig, with your pig-shaven tortoise poetry contests, etc… you win!
i’ve only just started with the blog thing, and had no prior experience with making intynet whatsoever. so i trawled various how-to sites, looking for technical tips in luddite-friendly language. but i kept getting distracted by the how-to blog sites. i especially like the ones that explain about grammar and Being Yourself. i’m facinated. and wondering how i could go about Being Myself just a little bit more.
oh, btw, why is it so important to have lots of people visit your blog? surely it’s not just a matter of being the Coolest Kid At School?
…oh, i really like reading your blog, mig. you must be the coolest kid at school. i read regularly, but never comment – feels a bit like i’m butting in on an eavesdropped conversation…
i’ve only just started with the blog thing, and had no prior experience with making intynet whatsoever. so i trawled various how-to sites, looking for technical tips in luddite-friendly language. but i kept getting distracted by the how-to blog sites. i especially like the ones that explain about grammar and Being Yourself. i’m facinated. and wondering how i could go about Being Myself just a little bit more.
oh, btw, why is it so important to have lots of people visit your blog? surely it’s not just a matter of being the Coolest Kid At School?
…oh, i really like reading your blog, mig. you must be the coolest kid at school. i read regularly, but never comment – feels a bit like i’m butting in on an eavesdropped conversation…
of course, there is the person who would have read your blog without getting bug buttons….
:-)