Use a tortoise to apply wax to your floor. Put a small blob on the hardwood floor, and let the turtle walk over it. In no time, you’ll have a uniform coat of wax throughout the room.

Works for tortoise shit, anyway.

Aw, she just woke up from hibernation. Isn’t she cute. Day or night, when I come into our office at home to do something important, like manage my Blogshares, the tortoise comes out of whatever corner she’s been hiding in and walks around my feet, her little claws clicking on the maple floor.

Sort of the tortoise version of an excited little dog happy to see you and running around yapping.