Had a good weekend, went to a couple spas, learned two things:
- If you have gas, don’t get a massage.
- If you get a massage anyway, don’t doze, no matter how relaxing and soothing it is, because you’ll spend the rest of your day wondering whether you farted in your sleep.
I was also reminded of another thing: naked people are great. At first I was reluctant to go to a spa because only old people with joint problems go to them. Then I remembered that I’m an old person with joint problems. Also, a whole spectrum of people go there, not just limping fat old people. Here is one of the places we went.
Various pools indoors and out, some with little bridges over them, under which I lurked, cool architecture, relaxing, great. Best of all was the big naked area with several different saunas. The naked area, or Zona Nuda as the multi-lingual signs said. Full of all sorts of people, all naked. And all beautiful. Short, tall, fat, skinny, young, old, beautiful.
I’m not saying everyone was attractive. But I was reminded of something Studs Terkel said once, that women look best naked. Men, eh, not sure. Maybe in a classic, dark two piece single-breasted suit. I don’t mean this in a sexual, sexist way, don’t misunderstand me. I don’t know what to think of Studs Terkel, but people are beautiful. Imperfect, but beautiful.
It takes a while to get used to the nakedness. It is a shame that people are led by the media to have this narrow picture of human beauty, though, you know? I realize I’m once again stating the obvious, but someone has to. You’re beautiful.
Don’t believe me? Take off your clothes and look. Look slow, not fast the way you look at some airbrushed fashion model. You are.
Am I really beautiful? Even with this scar? And this bruise, and these freckles? And I haven’t shaved my legs in two days and…
Hey, you know what? I AM beautiful. In that Salvador Dali sort of way.
Glad you had a good time, that spa is absolutely gorgeous looking.
reminds me of Andre Torrez’ piece about his ex-girlfriend going to sleep.
I remember a comment that was told to me when I was in college that stuck to my consciousness up to this day. I grew up very skinny and was very conscious about it. A classmate of mine invited me to a beach party with her family one time and when I went out in a bikini I thought her guests would make fun of me, but her unlce about 50+ told me “now you look better”. I knew he said it not in a sexual way.
For me at that time that was the best comment ever. up to this day.
look at that sweet ass!
speaking of “in a dali kind of way” i was looking for the poolside melting watches in the spa pics. what a cool, trippy place.
Joeri: wherever I go, a Belgian’s been there first. That’s exactly what I was talking about, that campaign. What a wonderful thing it would be if governments everywhere would do things like that. Maybe I should start a naked blogger project. Yes, I think I will.
Michele: Yes, you are beautiful and so was that spa.
Anita: Thanks for the Torrez link. I was going to tell my wife about that story at breakfast this morning, but then the cat brought a mouse and distracted me.
Willow: thanks for that story. The uncle, how did he manage that, to complement a young woman on her body? I’m always afraid I’d come across as a creep if I said something like, “I bet you look great naked” to a young woman.
Melly: Yes, Melly.
Pat: If you like Hundertwasser, there’s also an apartment house in Vienna he designed. I am a fan of his, although sometimes I think he was sort of playing the role of the wild artist… which I suppose is not a bad idea financially. We’ve encountered him in person three times. First, Alpha got into an argument with him about 21 years ago, saying he was not a genuine artist because all he did was paint these spirals year after year; this was funny because she started that argument at the ceremony to award him the Austrian State Medal for Art. Ha ha. Second, I interviewed him about 19 years ago for a newspaper in Vienna, and finally um, around that time, he walked up to me in Seattle, on the campus of the University of Washington, introduced himself and said he was looking for [woman's name]. I said, “Oh, yes, of course, Mr. Hundertwasser” as if everyone in Seattle was a big fan of his. Then the woman appeared – some architecture professor – and collared him and dragged him off. He had just arrived from Brazil, he told me before they left, and someone in a large red convertible had dropped him off and he was lost. Jetlag, I guess. Anyway.
yes, it’s a great idea whose time has come, but will people believe i’m serious?