The creature walks, the ghost, the spirit from the vacant house that youngsters see at dusk, over their shoulder or their father’s arm, watching from a cracked window, a curtain moving slightly in the breeze; it walks in autumn cold, clear autumn sun in a new winter coat and realizes, this is what color was made for, a crisp fall day – gold, orange and yellow against a sky of jigsaw-puzzle-blue, birch trees knitting it together with white and black and children in red jackets. The creature is eating lunch, cookies that are not what they promised and something with penne and curry and chicken and it walks a different street, past the artist’s mansion, where the crows do not know its face, not to avoid sharing, but to avoid interacting, and not out of some misanthropy (or miscoronisy) but because this afternoon demands one’s full attention. Pavement, dead leaves, brown grass, hand rails, green grass, tree bark, tar, a scrap of paper, apartment house facades, a mother speaking on a mobile telephone in a back yard while a small bundled toddler plays, facing away from her at an angle of 45 degrees, staring at something. One crow says something to another crow in a friendly voice, not a warning voice. A black limousine tailgates a black SUV. A man jogs past wearing a light summer jogging outfit – shorts and a white t-shirt. The creature walks.
Category Archives: ferner liefen
2017 metamorphosism.com St. Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest
This year’s contest is closed. Thanks to all entrants, and all visitors.
I originally planned to announce the winners earlier, but then I got busy at work, and when I got home I had to make a couscous/vegetable dish that seemed as if it would go quickly, but involved a lot of peeling and chopping so here we are.
The winners:
First of all, our sincere appreciation here at metamorphosism.com to everyone who entered. Everyone had sweet dispositions this year despite a few abrupt but unavoidable random (but mostly minor) rule changes, and there was no fighting or bickering, which was a big relief. So thank you, dudes, it was a lot of fun reading your poetry.
Before I continue: should the entry period be longer next year? It seemed to flash past this time, but maybe I’m just getting older, old people are always talking about how fast time goes by. Or maybe I was just busy (I was). Are two weeks enough? Would three weeks be better?
Ok, the winners:
First of all, to each entrant I say: we should get together for a coffee or a drink or something sometime.
Okay.
By the way, when we were in Ireland early last year, my wife and I – my wife is investigating our ancestors and we hired a genealogy butler and she claimed to have found the village my Irish ancestors came from, a few miles outside Limerick.
Where else could they possibly have come from.
It felt like in that one movie where the cities fold up only it was generations of my family history, folding up neatly on themselves.
Ok, anyway, the winners:
Oh, PS: do you think the creepy little clown drove people away? I thought it sort of captures the shadow side of the holiday, you know? But maybe that is better left to the limericks instead. I’ll try to have a more attractive graphic next year.
Ok.
Here we are:
Honorable mention goes to Cj for an autobiographical work about having Georgia on your mind. NICE TO SEE YOU AROUND AGAIN CJ!!! Have fun in Tbilisi.
Third place goes to TH who is apparently saving those worse limericks he was working on for next year’s contest. See you next year TH (if not before).
Dee gets the silver medal: three really fine limericks and hit a lot of the bonus themes as well. I was really happy to see you contributing, Dee.
Perry Iles takes first place this year, due only secondarily to one of the secret rules of this contest (“Perry always wins”) and primarily to both the quality and quantity of his entries, and his admirable ability to turn on a dime and incorporate new bonus themes as they arise, and also his occasional fucking with scansion, which made me LOL.
See you all next year. Thanks again!
Welcome to the 2017 edition of the metamorphosism.com International Limerick Contest.
Please leave your entries in the comments to this post.
Enter as often as you like.
This year’s theme: CURRENT EVENTS, plus bonus themes to be added as the contest progresses
All participants, new and seasoned veterans, are encouraged to consult the combined FAQ/rules below BECAUSE THEY CHANGE WHILE THE CONTEST IS GOING ON.
No one knows why.
FAQ/Rules
- Does it have to be a limerick? YES. This is strictly enforced, and non-limericks will not be accepted. Google proper limerick form if you are not sure.
- How do I enter? POST YOUR ENTRY OR ENTRIES in the comments to this post. Click on comment, or whatever is down there, and add a new comment.
- When is the deadline? THE DEADLINE is 14 February 2017
- Do you mean 12 midnight on the night of the 13th or midnight on the night of the 14th? And which time zone shall have seisin of jurisdiction? We have had considerably confusion in the past! NINE AM (CENTRAL EUROPEAN TIME) 14 February 2017.
- Oh by the way, I have a Quince tree on Cranes Lane. I think I should get a multiplier for that fact. No, sorry, that was last year. Secret multiplier in place.
- Is there a prize? NOT YET but that might change.
- Is there a limit to how often I can enter? NO. Enter as often as you like. The more often you enter, the better your chances.
- HOWEVER ONLY ORIGINAL ENTRIES ARE ACCEPTED. PLAGIARISM RESULTS IN DISQUALIFICATION. No exceptions made for members of the First Family.
- Can entries be bawdy? YES, absolutely. These are limericks, they can be bawdy, gross, you name it. It’s not required, but it is in the nature of the genre. ALSO: this is for St. Valentine’s Day so points awarded for love/romance/sex-related poetry.
- Complaints will be deleted. There is no avenue of appeal. Decisions of the judges are final. Be nice, and have fun, and don’t take this too seriously.
- Is there anything else I can do to be deleted? Yes. Besides complaints, anything else that is not a limerick will also be deleted, especially anything remotely similar to trolling, nastiness or disagreeing with me. That will get you deleted, and whatever else our technicians here can think up. This is meant to be a fun, light-hearted, non-political past-time.
- Let’s see, what else? Oh yes.
- Bonus points are awarded for inclusion of themes listed below (No limit to how many themes you may include, the more the better):
- Last-minute addition: Scottish insults (particularly in combination with USAmerican politics..)
- Current events i.e. tacky kakistocracy, apocaplexia, alternative facts,
Trump,etc etc etc think of it as catharsis. Use of the phrase “tacky kakistocracy” or something even better- Utopian visions
- Musical genres (see here for ideas, thanks Carola!)
- Cormac McCarthy, Don DeLillo, William Gibson et al
- Field dependence vs field independence
- Quantum theory
- The Tibetan Book of the Dead
- William S. Burroughs
- Funeral planning
- (More themes to come, watch this space.)
By entering you grant metamorphosism.com permission to publish your entry electronically on metamorphosism.com, in social media (including but not limited to twitter.com, facebook.com and anything else) as well as in book form, although the latter is REALLY unlikely, without compensation (this is a non-profit venture, and any possible, although unlikely, book would be, you know, for charity most likely).
AS ALWAYS, RULES ARE SUBJECT TO CONSTANT CHANGE DURING THE CONTEST, SO CHECK BACK OFTEN.
Now, get cracking.
Posted in Das Gehirn, ferner liefen, Metamorphosism
I’m automatically be it’s like a magnet
Here is what I did: I took the lyrics of two Tangerine Dream (random choice of band) songs (“Loved by the Sun” and “Kiev Mission” (no special reason)) and the NYT transcript of some things D0n4ld Trump said that recently became notorious and mashed them up in the Hay Kraynen Markov text generator.
I then spent minimal time cleaning up the text (sometimes it gets a little bit mangled in a Markov text generator). Those of you with synthesizers are welcome to use this for your next recording project. If you do, please send me a copy.
Only lightning strikes all the seasons
(spoken) Melania said this was down one of us as a date.
Who sing her, it’s, it’s here, come on shorty.
I’m automatically be it’s like a magnet.
Just kissing her.
You know and forever
Loved
Whoa.
I did try and I moved by the meeting them.
It’s hot as shit. In the good in man, yeah,
that’s, it’s still very beautiful — I just start kissing them.
It’s totally be in my microphone.
It’s some Tic Tacs just start
Legends can be now and (completed)
To be absorbed in the good
if you had to take one of us as a beautiful.
Look at the way, honey. Oh, good.
Hello, how are you.
Terrific. You know, that’s better.
This is much better not be they had a reach for goodness sake
Legends can be now and two go do our show.
Oh, you want.
Grab ’em by the start
You knows
Message
Communicating with friends
To exchange views
Boundlessness
Maybe it’s her. With the bus.
Bushy, Bushy.
Hello, nice co-star here.
Yes, absolutely.
Good.
Continent
Future
World
(that is torn apart
Legends can be now and forever
Teaching spells
Only light. Here we good in man.
Yeah, let’s, it’s like a right there is much between one.
make a right. Here we go.
Make meeting of all that’s a different one.
It better.
This always good legs.
No, no, Nancy. No, it’s better.
Now, if you. How are you? Pleasure right, you are a start
In the wise, there
World
(that’s singing
Hand in the gold. I don’t get in the music of all of love’s eternity
Whose shines so bright
The thought reader knows
Message
Communicating of youth, was married. Then all right
Hand in thought there is the middle.
It’s, it look.
She used to be a soap star,
thank you. Terrific.
You know and with friends can be now got off
the meet you when you’re a pussy.
You know and for good in man, yeah.
Oh, good.
Come on, Billy. You know, she was married.
Two and the bus.
Bushy, Bushy? I just start kissing all the handle.
Let the beginning is at the little hug, darling?
O.K., absolutely.
Good, that’s better.
This is the seasons
Only lightning strikes all the seasons
Legends can be now and even wait.
You know, she’re ready to loved by the seasons
Look at the mystics plays it’s cards
all of all I can see is hope the Fifth on that
is the little guy in?
How you do it. You knows
Boundlessness
Message
Communicating with friends
To exchange views
Boundlessness
Posted in Das Gehirn, ferner liefen, Metamorphosism
metamorphosism.com 2016 St. Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest
This year’s contest is finished!
Thanks to everyone who entered.
Here are the winners (I was going to leave them in the comments, but they’re not working for me. Are they broken for you too? Did anyone try to enter and find it impossible? Dang.)
Anyhow.
Third place: Tomas Green
Second place: Tim Rebstock
First place: KayO
Congratulations, everyone and thanks for entering!!
Welcome to the 2016 edition of the metamorphosism.com International Limerick Contest.
Please leave your entries in the comments to this post.
Enter as often as you like.
All participants, new and seasoned veterans, are encouraged to consult the combined FAQ/rules below BECAUSE THEY CHANGE WHILE THE CONTEST IS GOING ON.
No one knows why.
FAQ/Rules
- Does it have to be a limerick? YES. The judges are very strict. Google proper limerick form if you are not sure.
- How do I enter? POST YOUR ENTRY OR ENTRIES in the comments to this post. Click on comment, or whatever is down there, and add a new comment.
- When is the deadline? THE DEADLINE is 14 February 2016
- Do you mean 12 midnight on the night of the 13th or midnight on the night of the 14th? And which time zone shall have seisin of jurisdiction? We have had considerably confusion in the past! NINE AM (CENTRAL EUROPEAN TIME) 14 February.
- Oh by the way, I have a Quince tree on Cranes Lane. I think I should get a multiplier for that fact. OK, BY ALL MEANS. Secret multiplier in place.
- Is there a prize? NOT YET but that might change. I have 5kg of quince in my kitchen and hope to make some marmalade and some preserves tonite. UPDATE: I have tried the quince marmalade and it tastes okay so a winner could have a jar of that I guess, but only within Europe because shipping. Not sure about the quince/whisky preserves, haven’t tried that yet so no promises.
- Is there a limit to how often I can enter? NO. Enter as often as you like. The more often you enter, the better your chances.
- HOWEVER ONLY ORIGINAL ENTRIES ARE ACCEPTED. PLAGIARISM RESULTS IN DISQUALIFICATION.
- Can entries be bawdy? YES, absolutely. These are limericks, they can be bawdy, gross, you name it. It’s not required, but it is in the nature of the genre. ALSO: this is for St. Valentine’s Day so points awarded for love/romance/sex-related poetry.
- Complaints will be deleted. There is no avenue of appeal. Decisions of the judges are final. Be nice, and have fun, and don’t take this too seriously.
- Let’s see, what else? Oh yes.
- Bonus points are awarded for inclusion of themes listed below (No limit to how many themes you may include, the more the better):
- Limericks written in the voice/evocative of one or more of the following: Sarah Palin, William Gibson, David Foster Wallace, James Joyce, Ray Bradbury, Joyce Carol Oates, Philip K. Dick, Haruki Murakami, Jorge Luis Borges or George R.R. Martin
- Lesser-known philosophers
- Discredited or unpopular self-help ideas
- Invasive species
Alternatives to neo-liberal capitalism- Uncommon fetishes or obsessions
Authors and/or artists with two first initials, such as H.P. Lovecraft and e.e. cummingsConstruction cranes- Quince recipes, or other things one can do with quinces, or quince in general.
NEW ADDITION—>Malheur National Forest, Malheur Wildlife Refuge, etc, including but not limited to recent events in them parts, although that might be low-hanging fruit.“The Revenant” references disguised such that they are not spoilers.- By entering you grant metamorphosism.com permission to publish your entry electronically on metamorphosism.com, in social media (including but not limited to twitter.com, facebook.com and anything else) as well as in book form, although the latter is REALLY unlikely, without compensation (this is a non-profit venture, and any possible, although unlikely, book would be, you know, for charity most likely).
- AS ALWAYS, RULES ARE SUBJECT TO CONSTANT CHANGE DURING THE CONTEST, SO CHECK BACK OFTEN.
Now, get cracking.
Posted in Das Gehirn, ferner liefen, Metamorphosism