The slugs all have mobile phones and have been organizing flash mobs in my lettuce patch.

Via Twitter, I suspect.

slimy2009 MIG HAS SET OUT SAUCERS OF BEER! PARTAAAYY!!1! #lettucemob

My wife told me she saw a mob of slugs around one of the dishes I’d set out, drinking beer.

I thought they were supposed to get drunk and fall in or something, but they just have a drink and then go eat lettuce.

slimy2009 DUDE I AM SO BUZZED.


My wife thinks I didn’t put enough beer in the dishes. All I have is good beer, though, and I hate to share it with slugs. She also says the cat was drinking some.


mucouslvr @slimy2009 THE CAT?

slimy2009 @mucouslvr HOW’D U NO?

mucouslvr @slimy2009 I’M 3 SLUGZ 2 YR LEFT

My wife thinks more beer in deeper dishes might do the trick. I’m hoping it at least makes them slower and easier to catch.

13 responses to “Partay

  1. Trish

    I must say the scene sounds like one which occured not so long ago in the self same yard. I trust the slugs are not yelling at the hedgehogs window. May I suggest muscle relaxants. That’ll make them fall into the beer.

  2. anne

    Damn, Trish got the muscle relaxant joke in first.

    I’d like to state for the record that I didn’t TOUCH the lettuce.

  3. my pappy always gave them Coors or Pabst. Natural Light. some would say, “why waste the good stuff?” to the some i say, “slugs need Pabst Blue Ribbon, too.”

    can you get horrible, cheap beer in Austria? i mean, is that legal?

  4. Next time, don’t forget a little bowl of pretzels or maybe some Chex Mix

  5. mig

    Dang, Brian beat me to the pretzel joke.

    (slimy2009 @mucouslvr HEY THERES EVN PRETSELS NOM NOM ACK SALT!!!!1)

    Time permitting, I will buy several brands of beer and do a slug taste-test this weekend.

  6. Trish

    As long as all the little slug guys are wearing teeny tiny blindfolds.

  7. mig

    How do slugs clean their palates?

  8. joeri

    Please do not waste good beer, may I suggest Heineken? Although it is said Heineken is like having s*x in a canoe: f*cking close to water.

  9. mig

    Coincidentally, the gas station where I am planning to buy beer for the experiment is having a special on Heineken.

  10. I had better luck with this when the rim of the bowl was level with the soil ~ like a tiny slug sized, in-ground swimming pool of beer. I think your wife has a good point: deep bowl, more beer. I think I might have actually used tuna cans…

  11. mig

    ah, cans… i have plenty of cat food cans. now to find some cheap beer for the taste test.

  12. gordon

    I think I figured out how you can make some money writing blog posts… Mutual of Omaha has really been flailing about since Marlin Perkins died 23 years ago. Or perhaps you can get the winner of the beer taste test to sponsor you. Heck, why not both?

  13. Those little slugs of yours seems to be real gourmands: nipping on the aperitif, nibbling some appetizer … are you ready to serve the main dish? ;-)