I entertained myself on my way into work this morning, which was good because I was parked on the freeway for a whole hour while they cleaned up an accident. Parked.
I entertained myself as I sometimes do by devising new names for automobiles.
Fiat Maligna was one of my favorites.
Toyota names are fun: Toyota Cretina.
Body parts: Dodge Rectum. Volvo Uterus (a family van). Ford Sphincter (modernistic, concept sports-compact). Chevy Idiot. Ford Moron (or, if it’s a 4WD Ford Morono, with New Mexican desert background in the advertisement).
Dodge Offender (big SUV). Think I’ve made that joke before.
Buick Truss.
Chevy Mucus.
you know in the old days in korea they used to run competitions to name a new model of car. the first competition named hyundai’s very first car ‘pony’.
mimi smartypants suggests just putting the word “anal” in front of car names. anal navigator! anal fiesta! anal explorer!
Anal Probe.
Anal Dobl
Dobl
I thought that Volvo already meant something bad. Wasn’t that name a Swedish statement against macho?
The Volvo Vulvo? A two-seater, of course.
I referred to a Volvo as a Vulva once when I was a wee girl. Once. The laughter still rings in my ears. *pinkening in shame*
Kia Rhesus. Just because.
Or KIA Roscuro.
Wanker (the next-generation Hummer. Matter of fact, I’ll start referring to all Hummers – and there’s plenty of ‘em here in the Silly Cone Valley – as Wankers.)
Martin Amis’ (in his ‘Money’ novel) Ford Fiasco is my old time favourite.
That’s very good.
Chevrolet Nociceptor
Toyota Corollary.
And I just bought a Honda Accordeon.