Winners of the 2005 Valentine’s Limerick Contest (extra points were awarded for mentions of skin conditions, medical pioneers and microscopic animals; see all entries in comments to this post) are as follows:

Fastest limerick goes to Joeri for entering first (it’s also a fine limerick):

“Look! It’s snowing”, said Fritz in Berlin
(He’s a rather fat guy with bad skin)
It’s his head which he shakes
That produces the flakes
And the winter has yet to begin).

Best limerick actually mentioning Valentine’s day goes to Adam (no link given):
you’re the pierre to my marie curie,
you’re itself to my amoeba – asexually,
and although it sounds brash,
you’re growing on me like a rash,
so happy valentine’s day, baby!

Special Bustle in the Hedgerow award goes to zedzdead for this one:
There’s a lady who’s sure
All that glitters is gold
and she’s buying a stairway to heaven
when she gets there she knows if the stars are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for, ooh, ooh, oooooh, ooooh, ooh, and she’s buying a stairway to heaven.

Third Place goes to Mark for:
One creature not seen in this forum
Can cause me to lose my decorum:
The wee, diabolical,
Lives-in-a-follicle
Demodex folliculorum

Anna and jillbur tie for Second Place with:

My darling, we make a great match,
You itch and I love to scratch.
I’m so lucky to find
A girl of like mind
With a permanent dry scaly patch.

(and)

My tinea cruris is hideous–
Not a sight for the over-fastidious.
My wife finds the encrusting
To be truly disgusting
And the odor is sickly insidious

(respectively)

First Place this year goes to eeksypeeksy for a large number of fine limericks, including the following:

Doctor Fleming, the lucky young Scot,
Got a mold in his wee culture pot.
Penicillium notatum
Kicked the staph’s skinny bottom
And it’s good for whatever you’ve got.

Doctor Barnard exchanged the first hearts
Made of genuine cardiac parts
When a girl named Denise
Gave her heart, post-decease,
To one Lou, till the flu worked its arts.

Edward Jenner, the Gloucestershire doctor,
With a bit of the pox that had pocked her,
Gave from lassie to lad
The cow pox that she had
And to small pox, immunity’s locked door.

Doctor Koch said, “The food is inferia
At the 7-Eleven cafeteria
But I find that my herpes
Is soothed by their Slurpees
And I’m fond of their fresh Escherichia.”

Sincere thanks to all entrants. Next year’s Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest opens on 1 February 2006, if I remember.