My name is Vikram, I’ll be your host this evening.

Vikram introduced himself to me this morning as I prepared to leave for work, and we agreed that he is going into the novel that’s currently under construction. This will of course totally change everything – character relationships, tone and even plot somewhat, although the book’s pretty much plotted out by now. Sometimes I wonder where ideas and images come from, but in this case it’s fairly clear.

How does the subconscious work? Has this been sufficiently explored and explained and I just missed out on it, or does it remain mysterious to modern science as well as to me?

When I leave for work, and an inner voice nags at me, suggesting that I’ve forgotten something, what exactly it doesn’t know either or can’t say, just, Haven’t you forgotten something? Haven’t you?

Or, sends me image of keys or gets me thinking about telephones, and then it dawns on me I’m forgetting keys or a cell phone. What part of me is doing this and how does it do it?

And what part of me sends me images and characters and events for a book? How is it that I wake up in the morning and something has become clear, something new occurs to me, something is suddenly clearly lame and must be cut?

With Vikram and the Kundalini Ballroom Institute for Social Dancing … [hang on, have to run get a cup of coffee...]

Ahh, Neskafkafe.

With Vikram, it was like this: we were at dance class last night because we were too busy on Friday, also Beta was going to see the new Harry Potter with friends and I had a sore back so it was easier just to stay home.

So yesterday we were at class. DESPITE THE FACT THAT MY BACK HAD GROWN MUCH, MUCH WORSE IN THE MEANTIME.

I have a bad back, you know this, I whine about it here every time it happens.

It goes like this: small cramp in lower back, by pelvis actually. Ow. Pain causes spasm. Spasm causes pain. Pain causes new spasm. This cycle amplifies until I cannot stand up or move without looking funny, like Red Skelton playing an old man on a skit on his old TV show when I was a kid.

Cramped muscles hold my stiff pelvis at an unnatural angle. My spine makes the S-shape when viewed from the front, not the side.

I was miserable on Sunday, so Alpha sent me swimming with her and the kids (maybe the exercise would do me good… maybe it did, it didn’t hurt, to my surprise) and I managed to help give Beta some pointers on her crawl (take breaths on the side, not the front, arms out of the water elbow first, etc). Alpha even said the magic words,

“Teach me to crawl too, Mig.”

How could I turn her down? We have to decide on a safe word first, though.

So we went dancing. I figured, since ballroom dancing is all about the pelvis anyway (ballroom dancing is sexy, man! Go try it out if you don’t believe me) maybe it would loosen me up a little. Even if it went hellishly wrong, I figured, I would at least have something to blog about.

Yeah, well. The six-foot tall redhead who reminds me of Melly was there. Actually, a lot of babes in general for a Sunday, totally. And me, trying to dance with a stiff back, and a whole lot of very klutzy guys. It was like, we tried a few new steps and instant mosh pit.

Every now and then I’d get frisky and wiggle a little too much and the back went *DOING* and I’d grimace and Alpha would try to support me by my elbow yet continue dancing like nothing was wrong and I’d go, “Quit supporting me by my elbow who’s leading here you or me?” and, beads of sweat on my forehead, we’d dance on.

And it struck me that, with this dancing and my pelvic/back pain, I’ve got a total Kundalini problem going. The dance teacher and his charming assistant demonstrated a few steps, and their Kundalini serpents are just fine, I’m telling you. I used to view the whole chakra thing as a fair source of humor, and I obviously still do, and I might take a totally humorous view of it except for this:

Once, a couple years ago (I think I may have posted about it here or at the old location a long time ago) I’d been reading up on chakras and Kundalini and was in our kitchen joking about it to Alpha and Beta (and maybe baby Gamma, not sure). I had a orange toy snake, one of those things built out of jointed plastic segments that, when you hold it horizontally, you can make it wiggle like a serpent.

I held it down at pelvis level, ahem, and started going on in my best guru voice about the mighty serpent of Kundalini, and damned if I didn’t end up in spasms of laughter on the floor, uncontrollable paroxysms of laughter, tears streaming from my eyes, helplessly collapsed.

Which, it turns out, is usually what happens when the Kundalini force is released the first time, or something like that. Anyway, that condition is typical for something or other to do with Kundalini.

And at night when I went to bed I was thinking about all that. And a while back I read some movie review about this Indian actor who, in the movie, wants to be a Hollywood star instead of Bollywood and comes to the states and ends up a waiter instead, but then becomes a guru. Forgot the title of the movie, it wouldn’t help anyway because they always change them when they translate them into German.

And this morning, Vikram introduced himself to me, himself and his Kundalini Ballroom Institute for Social Dance. And now I’m trying to figure out just what to do with it.