Announcing the third annual Metamorphosism St. Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest, which is actually the fifth annual contest of its kind here.
Important: entries will be disqualified if they don’t follow this year’s rules!
And here are this year’s rules:
- Entries must be proper limericks. Limerick information here, here, here, here, here, here and here.
- Deadline is 14 February 2006
- Entries must be submitted to comments in this post.
- Entries must include something. Last year they had to include references to medical pioneers, microscopic animals and skin conditions. The year before that it was psychiatrists/psychologists, the year before that philosophers. So this year, extra points will be awarded for references to hair bands, disfiguring diseases and or types of Roman gladiators.
- I am the boss of the rules, and may change them arbitrarily as usual.
An unfortunate gladiator with leprosy
was something people always came to see
when projectiles ran short
and without a second thought
he’d use parts of his own body.
ah no, not again…
but it’s always fun to read other people’s entries.
what about introducing haiku??
haiku are fine, as long as they scan as limericks:
daDAdadaDAdadaDA
daDAdadaDAdadaDA
daDAdadaDAdada
DAdadaDAdada
DAdadaDAdadaDA.
or something like that.
for example:
There once was a frog from Sapporo
That said, I can’t eat flies no more-o
It tried a big steak
but that gave it an ache
And now it can’t hop off the floor-o.
So, yeah, haiku=fine.
Hurray for the third annual Metamorphosism St. Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest!!!
A Thracian with elephantiasis
who was suffering from anhidrosis
thought: “Man, who’d have thunk
I’d find a use for this trunk”
as he drank the whole of the oasis.
ha ha ha! ok, i’ll try to think of a limerick…
An old gladiator covered in bruises and cuts,
who had earned many sacks of sestertius,
said: “The event I’ll always remember,
was the damage done to my member,
by that guy who slammed a trident in my nuts.”
The guy with the trident would be a Retiarius.
I wish I’d known that. That could’ve worked really well.
Also, this is a helpful site if anyone is stuck and looking for rhymes: http://www.rhymezone.com
This is proof, I fear, that I am either shameless or don’t have enough to do. Or both.
A sword fighter, Dimachaeiri,
was hirsute all over, quite hairy.
With his lover’s hair bands
he managed the strands
though the fix made him look a right fairy.
Also handy, Name That Gladiator!
http://www.unrv.com/culture/roman-gladiators.php
Also handy, hair band info:
http://www.answers.com/topic/hair-metal
****! I found myself wondering if this is what you meant, and I thought nothing rhymes with Kajagoogoo. Plus, metal or pop? Metal or pop? I went with the first interpretation and now I lie awaking thinking of things that rhyme with Dee Snyder. Flock of Seagulls had some MAJOR hair action and so did Stray Cats, at first…
Kajagoogoo. Bah.
From Cheap Trick to Motley Crue
When Brutus’ haircut won’t do
These God-sons of Sampson
Hold good taste for ransom
And promote hirsuitism too.
Ted Nugent has gone a bit gamey
Venatore now; not so brainy
Traded
Like the Korean skaters on ice
I can’t compete with lines so nice
As those in Lisa’s rhyme
And I’ve run out of time
Next year, I will try again, twice.