First of all, a critique of international organizations: congratulations to the IAEA and its director general for winning the Nobel Peace Prize… Also: what bugs me about the United Nations? The blue marlin is dry, in the cafeteria, although the pasta was okay; and the vending machine? It’s been out of peanut M&Ms for four days now. Four days.
Sitting there at the conference taking notes on a laptop on my lap, I got no reception on the headphone/receiver set that is supposed to receive the simultaneous interpretation and I figured out that was because I was wearing it around my neck, it was too close to the laptop and getting jammed. I moved it away and reception was fine. Which made me realize they’re not calling them notebooks now for nothing. Calling them laptops suggested to users that you should be able to keep them on your laps. Imagine what that field does to your johnson, man. To your poor testicles, toasting all day in that field. And I was sitting like that for a week.
I’ve got some odd electrical field action of my own going on. I burn out lightbulbs a lot. Turn on the light, and blam. Walk under a ceiling lamp, and zzzt. Like Yul Brynner walking down that hallway in Westworld with all the lights going dark.
This would explain all the electrical problems my Fiat had, if I wasn’t convinced it was just a piece of crap. The muffler just went out last night, by the way. Did you know that? When did I have that fixed, just a couple months ago man.
Static electricity. In winter, I get lots of shocks when I try locking the car after getting out after a drive. And Beta, you don’t want to come anywhere near her upon getting out of the car. She inherited it from me. We climb out of the car, we avoid each other for a while.
The radio mouse we have on the computer, it went on the blink again this morning. Beta was home all day from school yesterday because all she had scheduled was an hour of French so she just decided not to go to the trouble and sat home and chatted on the PC or something all day probably. And now the mouse is broken.
“It’s all Beta’s fault,” said Alpha. “She and her electrical field.”
Apparently what Beta’s electrical field does is sap the batteries in the mouse, because I just inserted two new ones and it works again.
Maybe you have superpowers?
you’re absolutely shocking!
Then you should watch “Agata und der Sturm” (http://www.filmstarts.de/kritiken/Agata%20und%20der%20Sturm.html)
Excellent and funny movie.
I’ve developed a flinch response before even touching metal doorknobs and car doors, now, after so many shocks. I always wondered if buying some of those grounding strips (advertised for car sickness) would prevent it, or if you can get a grounding strap for your leg, or something. But I bet Beta wears rubber-soled shoes a lot.
I like this:
http://www.amasci.com/emotor/zapped.html
i dunno what you call my electrical field then, because mine makes every computer/printer/copier break down when i get stressed.
Thanks for reminding me that with winter comes the static electricity.
Anybody remember the rubber caps that hotels used to put over doorknobs? My sister and I would shuffle along the thick carpets and then – zzzt!
I bet you have carpet in your house.