Don’t forget to have her check you for… says Odin’s wife.
Yeah, yeah, says Odin, who is going to the dermatologist.
Odin is used to waiting a long time at doctors, so he is a little surprised by the speed at which things transpire this time.
Do you have time to check me for… he asks the doctor after spending less than a single article in an obsolete magazine in the waiting room.
Sure, she says. He gets undressed and she looks him over. A mirror takes him by surprise and he resolves to work out more and eat less.
Nothing he had worried about was anything to worry about, she says, But this here, now. It should go immediately. You want an appointment or shall we do it now?
Um, says Odin. Now, I guess.
Let me show it to you, enlarged on the monitor.
Odin looks at it, feeling like a character in an H.P. Lovecraft story gazing upon an Old One nestled down amidst belly hairs enlarged to two-by-fours.
Yeah, let’s do it now, he says, with increased vigor.
Back onto the table, shave, shot, cookie-cutter, stitch, stitch, bandaid and he’s standing up again looking at the hygienic paper cover the doctor had unrolled over the table before plopping him down. It looks like the Shroud of Turin, a little crumpled, with a sweat stain the size and shape of a medium-to-large man and, down by the feet, a bunch of black fuzz.
Apparently Odin’s socks today are lintier than average.
Or: the Effects of Fear-Induced Perspiration on Lint Adhesion, thinks Odin.
I always thought it was just a mole, thinks Odin. But it was something else. Something… eldritch and ancient.
In this fashion, Odin will go about cheering himself up.
The doctor gives him an an appointment to have the stitches out on April first. Upon hearing the date, tasteless prank after prank begin scrolling through Odin’s brain.
Nothing he could ever really do, but still. He is thankful for the distraction, it keeps him from thinking about the linty, sweaty paper, and about the tiny, ancient thing.