Are we there yet?

An old friend who had been underemployed with one crappy job after another (but a wide variety of them) for the last twenty-three years, all topped off with a period of unemployment followed up by another crappy job, this friend just landed a dream job. The job incorporates all the skills she accumulated in those other jobs. She beat out more than 200 other applicants for the position because she was a perfect fit. That last sentence almost but not quite sounded dirty didn’t it? My point is some of us — exactly how many I don’t know, let’s say 100% — go through life like that, bumbling along thinking our life is going nowhere, when in fact we are becoming more and more unique and suited for our dream job, a perfect situation where all our unique skills and qualities we’ve developed are put to perfect use, empowering and fulfilling us and helping others at the same time. Some of us — let’s say 99% — of course don’t know exactly what this dream job is, and some of us are like, gonna drink all that gin all by yourself? Because maybe we never find that position. Not sure what that percentage is, but it’s probably depressingly high. What I’m saying is, life has value and you’re like a diamond, somehow, maybe, even if that dream job never gets invented, because you’re getting better and better at being yourself. Not that diamonds get better at being themselves or anything, that diamond image just occurred to me as I was typing this, because a diamond is a small, hard expensive thing with faults, like a human heart or soul or third eye or something.

I found out yesterday, by the way, that the UN commissary here in Vienna does not stock absinthe, for heaven’s sake. I’ve seen it in grocery stores in Vienna, but not there. I’ve never been inside the commissary, because you need special commissary status to do that, so I don’t know what it looks like inside. Maybe it’s logical that they don’t stock absinthe. But it’s just as possible that they do stock all these ususual drinks from various cultures around the world, such as single-malt. Which I know for a fact they do stock. I mean, I can imagine a conversation like this:

    Absinthe, no what is absinthe? Is something for eat?
    No, it’s a green drink.
    Try wine section?
    No, a bright green booze. It would be in the booze section.
    Ah, such as gleen!
    Gleen?
    Is very rare. Top shelf. Made with small monkey, live high up in forest canopy usually. Catch them, feed with gleen, that is why is called gleen you see?
    Gleen is made of gleen, then? So what is gleen?
    Green booze, I say already. You want fifth or gallon bottle? Good for gleen ceremony, is traditional.
    Um…

Anyway, no absinthe.

3 responses to “Are we there yet?

  1. i see the signs, mig. can you see the signs? they are quite large, and they can be seen from a distance; they are signs that one might see on the side of the road, for example. guiding signs, directional signs, signs that tell you that you are heading in a particular direction for some purpose or another.
    and, uhm, the signs are GREEN.

    translation: the beverage you desire is practically already IN THE GLASS.

  2. But you really don’t need any extra holes in your head. I mean brain. Absinthe is contraindicated, at least for 99% of us, plus it turns you into a total asshole while you’re high on it. Good lord, the assholery around these parts in the late 80s – early 90s, when someone had a Czech connection. Much more fun is a cool old bottle from an estate store, plus some Everclear, blue curacao, and a drop of yellow food coloring. The diplomats will never know the difference.

  3. mig

    That reminds me of a newspaper article I read as a kid back in Washington State about some guys on a local reservation arrested for pissing into whisky bottles and selling them as, you know, whisky.