They came upon a spider

Sitting upon a woodpile.

It was a friendly-looking chap. Friendly enough, at any rate. It put down the poisonous four foot snake it was eating and acknowledged their presence.

Motherf, said the spider. Where’d you come from?

Us? said the first. What about you?

Everyone knows where I came from, said the spider, asshgr.

What is with your unusual manner of speech, inquired the second.

I have rare form of Tourette’s today, which compels me to utter obscenities while rendering me unable to actually get them out. It’ll pass, said the spider.

Snake helps, in fact, so if you don”t mind, said the spider.

The first one and the second one both nodded and gestured, as if to say, please, don’t mind us.

Very fffff, said the spider.

Who was that, said the first one, when they were out of earshot.

It looked like a hobo spider, said the second, a very large one.

Then we are on the right path.

3 responses to “They came upon a spider

  1. bran

    Snake helps just about every malady beginning with T. Tinitis? Eat some snake. Tennis elbow? Snake. Tachycardia? Big plates of snake.

  2. I would be remiss if I didn’t forward this to you…

  3. mig

    That looks like a lot of work.