8th metamorphosism.com International Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest


Time for the 8th (I think) annual Metamorphosism International Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest.

Enter in the comments to this post.
Winners will be announced on 14 February, 2009.
ENTER AS OFTEN AS YOU LIKE!!! But read the rules before entering! Or else!



  1. Poems entered must be an actual limerick. We are strict about this.
  2. Entries must contain a Latin word or phrase.
  3. Extra points awarded for working in one of the following: a king, a burlesque performer, an extinct or rare musical instrument, a prosthesis, NEW: an obsolete, extinct or rare musical instrument. NEW RULE CHANGE HERE: No kings, prostheses or obsolete musical instruments after all. All entries with kings, prostheses or obsolete musical instruments will be disqualified. Unusual or innovative musical instruments will still be allowed. Instead of kings, extra points will be awarded for parasitic diseases affecting the behavior of rats. Prostheses and prosthetic devices shall be replaced by surgical equipment.
  4. NEW RULES (made necessary by the unfortunate flame war in the entries): entries are to include themes of general bawdiness, redeption and reconciliation. Bonus characters: famous peace activists, famous ventriloquists, escape artists. Bonus languages: Latin, Icelandic.
  5. Rules subject to change without warning (changes will be posted here or in a subsequent post)

(Note: Over the years, a number of rude etc expressions have been added to the comment blacklist so if the comments refuse your entry that might be the reason. In that case, mail it to me at metamorphosist (at) gmail dot c0m and I’ll set you up.)

Feel free to search this site for past winners. Good luck.

234 responses to “8th metamorphosism.com International Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest

  1. Trish

    “Já”, Jon Zealondo said, in his thong.
    We’ve all learned how to love and get on.
    “Bottoms Up” said Sean Mac Bride
    “In vino veritas reside.”
    In this world we all can belong.

  2. Trish

    For I’m just an old hippy ‘tis true
    Though our values we all may think true
    Fair play to the voice
    That will fight and rejoice
    To wit Muireann, Jann, Ann, Trish and You!

  3. Jann

    ML’s husbands in Philly she’d shed,
    And her handsome hill bílly had wed,
    Of course this came after,
    Six kids and much laughter,
    “All’s well that ends well,” she said.

  4. Jann

    I like everyone ev’n Anon,
    We’ve had some good fun so come on,
    Let’s all go out dancing,
    I’ll do the financing,
    Tomorrow we’ll see what we’ve won!

  5. Ian

    There once was a man from Nantucket
    Who played Burlesque tunes on paper, comb and bucket,
    In a Desmond Tutu
    Kicked his heels, said “woo-hoo”
    Bless! A bene placito instructed

  6. Tony

    Mánudagur, we’ll have no more rhyme
    And how will we have a good time
    A menso et thoro
    Shall we all be tomorrow
    In voco alternis, sublime

  7. Trish

    Mig asked Rod Hull Emu to hide
    For in matters of Pax Mig did pride
    Á gráum hærum gloggt var kenndur
    With his bloggings most tender
    But he was Emu O’ Houdini. Woe betide!

  8. Thomas

    My philisophy is an eclectic hodge-Podge
    Posterior Analytics will please but thee Rodge
    Einn miða til the Chipper takk fyrir
    I may be Raptus regaliter
    But a medieval diet is bland stodge

  9. mn

    I’m back, yes I’m back Aquinas
    Ah who are you but bit of an ass
    Mahatma you are not
    Nox erat Góða nótt
    Go back to the back of the class

  10. mn

    Oh Lord, at the Opera I was so bored
    Escape? Houdini? I do what i am told
    Of redeption (sic)
    Does he think we’re thick?
    Henry Kissinger would be prompted to scold

  11. mn

    The opera came to our hood
    It wasn’t bad it was good
    It was on in Belvedere
    Which you know is very near
    And it wasn’t bawdy or lewd

  12. mn

    Ah Trish you kept it going thanks a lot
    And in the end we do care a jot
    you brought in our friends
    to win at the end
    Valentine’s Day Hafðu það gott

  13. mn

    I suppose I could remember jack the ripper
    oh sorry was he not a stripper?
    Kissinger kissogram,
    Aquinas’ your latin man
    Ah Skál! I’m off to the chipper

  14. mn

    My valentine Tony’s quite bawdy
    And that thing with Podge was quite tawdry
    reconciliation deception
    and then a reception
    Who’d blame him, his wife is quite gaudy

  15. mn

    I’m sorry i was mean re your wife
    These new rules have given me fright
    I never met Emu
    I should bid you adieu
    But Halló i’m on a bit of a skite

  16. mn

    Ah Trish come on I can’t last
    my alter ego is taking a blast
    Go fix your iphone
    Don’t leave me alone
    Nox erat i’m not made of glass

  17. mn

    ok now line up Tony and Ian
    and indicate just what you mean
    your verse is perverse
    but we’re over the worst
    In Iceland the EMU’s a deal

  18. mn

    Tony wants to mention West Brom
    they failed to sign Gudjonsson
    The Player’s a joke
    Like his country, he’s broke
    And as Jann says re Vera “Game on”

  19. mn

    of course he could type it himself
    but as you guessed he is washing the delph
    his wife is so lazy
    and her thinking is hazy
    she thinks the delph washes itself

  20. mn

    It is now 9.27 pm
    but where? in Dublin or Wien?
    Ah Mig end it now
    or Burlesque jungfrau
    will ne’r be a virgin again

  21. mn

    So what will we all do tommorrow
    I’m stuck in this rhyme line begorrah
    I’m sick of the rules though
    it was better a while ago
    when latin and fluzies were borrowed

  22. mn

    So goodnight and goodbye my new friends
    I’m now making latin a trend
    I’ve bonded with Mater
    I will call her later
    We’ll laugh at the rhymes that i sent


  23. Not my best work this year, but here goes

    As Wayland and Madame go crazy,
    Your intellect might just get lazy
    The puppet is thinner
    When his hand’s not in her,
    A man plays the dirty old lady!

    I had to take redemption and reconcilation literally!

    I redeem lots of coupons and rebates,
    Reconciling my checkbook on pay dates.
    It would take a Houdini
    To eat beans and weenies
    And save enough for future loan rates.

  24. (That was two seperate limericks with comments in between)

  25. As Wayland and Madame go crazy
    Your intellect might just get lazy
    The puppet is thinner
    When his hand’s not in her,
    A man plays the dirty old lady!

  26. I redeem lots of coupons and rebates
    Reconciling my checkbook on pay dates
    It would take a Houdini
    To eat beans and weenies
    And save enough for future loan rates

  27. Sorry for the mess–I figure Mig can delete my earlier, combined ones

  28. Mark S

    (Hooray for general bawdiness!)

    A blonde with an marvelous body
    At college was nothing but naughty
    But since each instructor
    Is known to have f*cked her
    She finished up summa cum laude

  29. k.


    this is insane, and i’ve quite enjoyed it.

  30. Pingback: Metamorphosism» Blog Archive » Winners of the 2009 Metamorphosism St. Valentine’s Day Limerick Contest

  31. Aww, I’m disqualified for tardiness, but can I submit one anyway and look forward to next year?

    Here it is:

    There once was a man from Belfiore

    Who, drunk, made his wife cry Orrore!

    She found him one day,

    reading Gandhi, they say,

    Then he sobered, ab imo pectore.

  32. mn

    Trish told me you sent in an entry
    and you sounded like one of the gentry
    instead of val’s day
    you chose Ash Wednesday
    to exchange with us your pleasantries

  33. mn

    Well ashes to dust at Lent
    On candles my money i spent
    I met Duncan and John
    But I’m still carrying on
    I’m afraid that I didn’t repent

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